Stay!
It's daring.
That really pisses me off.
My brain, Mark.
Nothing happened.
Fuck man.
Good evening and welcome to this special edition of Taskmaster.
For the next hour or so Christmas will be a party for the minds. [Play on the Danish phrase: Christmas is a party for the hearts. It means that at Christmas love is at the core of what we’re celebrating]
There's a lot of hustle among our 5 contestants.
Because they know they can all win the most valuable gift of the year.
But who will be the lucky winner? Will it be Hadi Ka-koush? [actor and singer - known from starring in The Bridge]
Or Petra Nagel? [journalist and TV-Host - known for her show on cultural differences when it comes to dating].
Or Anders Lund Madsen? [Quirky journalist, comedian and TV-Host - known for being extremely intelligent].
Or Kathrine Abrahamsen? [Podcaster and journalist - known for her radio show "Kattepinen"].
Or Jesper Ole Feit Andersen? [Actor - known for Minkavlerne with previous winner Jonas Mogensen].
♪ Now it's Mark again, now it's Mark again, and Mark is also called le Fêvre. ♪
♪ And he's sitting here, Just right there. ♪ [Lasse’s singing it to the tune of the Danish Christmas song: Nu er det jul igen//Now it’s Christmas again]
♪ And his name is still Mark le Fêvre. ♪ Hi, Mark. [Lasse’s singing it to the tune of the Danish Christmas song: Nu er det jul igen//Now it’s Christmas again]
Have you done anything special during the holidays?
I've finally redeemed last year's Christmas present.
For a long time, I have wanted us to get matching tattoos.
And...
Sweet.
Now you're old and wrinkly, now you're all young and fresh.
I'm kind of excited to see how yours turned out.
Now it might get a little awkward.
Yeah, yeah. Here we go again.
- Mark has screwed up. - No, he hasn't... Or ...
Maybe I've just misunderstood the gift.
I've gotten mine on the ankle.
Is this something?
Okay. That's cool.
Are you bummed that it's not your face on his ankle?
No, I think it looks nicer this way.
We both agree on that. The winner of this episode can win this beauty:
My puffy face made with gingerbread cookie.
Let's get started with the first task.
The first task we’re starting with might not -
- not expose the participants' lack of grammar rules.
- I didn't get it. - A really shitty task.
It's important to get off to a good start, so let's begin with a shitty task.
Hey, Mark. It’s Christmas time.
A rattle, a hat and a little marzipan pig.
- What symbolism. - Jingle bells.
Can I put on the Santa hat?
I mean yeah, I guess... I would probably read the task first.
Well... It says: "Do the opposite of the following:"
I can't even do what I'm supposed to do.
"Do the opposite of the following:" I'm going to look like an idiot.
Okay, hold on tight.
"Do the opposite of the following:"
"Under no circumstances do not avoid..."
"...not making the bells not ring."
"Don't refrain from not..." What?
"Don’t refrain from not putting on the Santa hat."
"And at no point in time do not not to bite the head off of the pig."
"The task is complete when you have..."
"...or haven’t performed the actions and said, 'I think I’ve done it right.'"
"The fastest to not do the wrong things wins."
"If you do the right things then you’re not disqualified."
"Your time began when you started reading." You could have said something!
Not plus, not plus, not plus, not -
- plus not, plus not, plus not, plus not.
I can’t make sense of it. It’s just words in my head right now.
I can't deny that I'm not not-excited about this task.
Mark, please don't avoid not repeating the rules.
It's very simple.
"Contestants should under no circumstances avoid not -
- to not ring the bells, refrain from not putting on the hats -
- and at no point not biting the head off the pig."
They just need to do the opposite of that. It’s relatively easy.
Who's going to be the first to try this mischievous Christmas task?
I'm thinking we'll start with you, Hadi.
"Do not avoid not making the bells not ring."
Did Lasse make this task? What an idiot.
I can't avoid it. So I have to do it.
And I must under no circumstances avoid to not...
I must...
I'm not allowed to put on the Santa hat.
"Do not refrain..."
"You must under no circumstances avoid to refrain from -
- not biting the head of the marzipan pig."
I think I've done it right.
Are you now going to say something that’ll make me really pissed?
Read the first line.
"Do the opposite of the following:" I'm an idiot.
That really pissed me off.
Oh, you big idiot. Lasse, I don’t want to do this anymore.
I have to remind myself, that on stage I have to get up and -
- show my middle finger to Lasse and say: “See ya”.
- Maybe I’ve done it right but I don’t get it. - That's a real possibility.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas, Mark.
Merry Christmas. Fucking Christmas.
It turns out that you have a small -
- but significant problem.
When you say: "Should I stand up and show Lasse my middle finger?"
You may well have to.
But even there you forget the first line: "Do the opposite."
- You forgot that, Hadi. - It was not a good day at the office.
But did I do it right?
I know did the opposite of what I was supposed to, but was it right?
Did I understand the task? I still don't know.
- I’m not going to tell you right now. - Great.
- But there are 4 other contestants. - Yep, that’s right.
We’ll watch two contestants now.
We’re in the world of Danish grammar. Luckily, we have clever contestants.
One has written his own dictionary the other is a reality show host. [Anders has written a comedy dictionary where he describes words that do not exists. Petra is the host of the Danish version of Bachelorette]
What do you think you're supposed to do?
I'm in the process of translating if I should get that thing to ring or not.
I must not, under any circumstances... I must not not avoid ...
I must not not avoid, so that’s must.
Okay, from the top.
No, I can't. I must. I had to choose myself. No.
Damn it. What do you think?
That's a tough one.
Double not is nothing. Not, not is yes.
To refrain is to not do. "Don’t avoid..."
"Don't avoid..." It’s 2, 4. It's still must. "Make the bells not ring."
"To refrain from... Don't refrain from..."
I need to do the the opposite of the following. Ah!
Not, not is a yes. It's yes!
Then don’t refrain from ...
My brain is about to explode. This is so insane.
"Don’t refrain from putting on the Santa hat."
Don't refrain, but do the the opposite of that. Put on the Santa hat.
"Don't refrain..."
- I did it. - The hat is on.
That's a tough one. So it's not, not, not, not.
You're going to eat the head?
I think I've done it right.
Should I bite the head off? Yes.
Time.
I think I've done it right.
How confident are you that you have the right solution?
We're just good friends, and we did the same exact things.
I'm not sure. Are you?
We just heard that we should’ve done the opposite.
Didn't we do the opposite? Or?
I'll keep the suspense about the correct solution for a little while longer.
But fastest wins.
- Mark? - Anders you were faster than Petra.
But you were both faster than Hadi -
- who is by far the slowest.
But, and I don't know if that's any consolation...
Hadi, you're not the one who solved the task the slowest.
- Because... - What?
Because you didn't solve the task.
I should have mentioned that at the beginning. Your solution is not correct.
Mark, we're missing Jesper and Kathrine. Do they have a brilliant solution for this?
They use the same kind of tactics which people could learn a thing or two from.
Because what do you do if a test is difficult? You guess.
Avoid plus not plus not plus.
"Do not avoid." Then you must. Shh!
Ugh.
I don't know.
I think I can do this.
I think I’ll just do it. Because it's the most fun.
I think I've done it right.
Everyone’s right. The majority is always right.
Because you’re four that have chosen the same solution?
Mark, isn't it time to share the correct solution -
- and reveal what the contestants were supposed to do?
I’ll start off by saying, I was confused as well.
I’ll show the task.
Now I'm removing the denials which cancel each other out.
"Under no circumstances do not" cancel each other out.
"Do not avoid" also cancels. So does "don't refrain" and "don't not".
We are left with this sentence:
"Don't make the bells ring -
- don't put on the Santa hat -
- and at no time bite the head off of the marzipan pig."
- But... But... - But... But...
But...!
- The opposite! - The opposite!
Oh my god!
When the task came up, I thought: Yes! No one gets points.
I, again, forgot: "Do the opposite of the following:"
4 contestants solved the task correctly. How are the points distributed?
This shouldn't come as a shock. There are 0 points for you, Hadi.
There’s 2 points for Petra, 3 for Jesper Ole and 4 for Kathrine.
But in front we have Anders Lund Madsen.
Let’s move on. Here's a suggestion: Maybe something that's not quite as difficult.
Maybe something that’s even a little bit stupid.
For example, if someone had mixed up Christmas and Easter -
- and ordered the wrong costume. Of course, that’s a hypothetical example.
Yeah.
- Mark? - Hi, Petra.
I hope this task drags on.
That's one lousy rabbit.
- You're dressed as the Easter bunny? - It's a stupid mistake.
- Don't you know Danish Christmas traditions? - I was late, they only had the Easter bunny costume left.
But we made it work.
I just threw a camel at you. And nothing’s coming the other way.
You're just like all the other rabbits. Big mouth, long front teeth.
But can you do anything?
- You're much cuter with that on. - It's something about an egg.
What was that? What was that, cheeky little rabbit?
"Place the Easter egg..."
"In the egg cup in the most daring way possible."
- "In the most daring way possible." - "A broken egg is a disqualification."
"You have 20 minutes. Your time starts..."
"Now."
Most daring way.
Daring would be with a high risk of going wrong.
It’ll break.
What if it was "Mission Impossible"-esque?
Yeah, maybe that’s something.
That's Odysseus.
He's going home from Troy. But what a trip he has to go through.
That's a good idea.
- Is it daring? - Very.
A lot of different trials along the way.
A wide variety of ideas are at play.
Wasn't it a long day at work for Mark le Fêvre?
The contestants had to get the egg into the egg cup in the most daring way possible.
For me it was all about breath control.
But also my fear of germs. First, it was the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.
Afterwards I'm told: "That suit hasn't been washed in 15 years."
Where do we begin? Answer quickly before you die...
...from the infection you've gotten from the suit.
Let's start with Hadi. Did I mention the suit was hot?
Maybe one of those tubes -
- where it slides down and lands.
It's not completely stupid.
It’s 2 meters now. Come on.
It's there now. This counts, right?
Can I get another attempt that's even more daring?
If you can.
Shit.
Can I see what it looks like in there?
Are you hot, Mark?
Phew.
The task says:
"If the Easter egg breaks then you are disqualified."
Here’s where you miss the sentence:
"The opposite of this applies."
I said loud and clear: "This doesn't count."
I had made my attempt. So I just wanted to try that for fun.
It's kind of the same as saying: "Now I'm going to make my own rules."
What about a Christmas truce? Just once a year?
Let's keep the good mood and feel like a family just once a year.
With one disappointing son. You’re disqualified.
One broken egg. Who can do better?
We're actually going to you, Jesper Ole.
It's weird if you want to see someone who doing it better.
How about if this guy is the one putting the Easter egg in the egg cup?
If we glue ...
... this egg ...
Nothing happened. All is well.
Yeah.
That's too bad. It was a good idea.
Merry Christmas.
Bummer.
- Jesper ... - That was shit. S-h-i-t.
I wanted to say: That was an exciting idea. But we never see it.
I sit and watch an entire career -
- as Denmark's new Jørgen Clevin go straight in the gutter. [He’s an old and beloved children’s book author and tv host]
Two broken eggs. There must be someone -
- who can come up with a daring way to place an egg in an egg cup?
I can offer you two.
There's an old rumor that
- that women like men in uniform.
I didn't realize that this also applied to an unwashed old rabbit costume.
No?
Uh!
Actually, I'm getting a cheeky stomach ache right now.
This is daring.
- Can you feel it falling in? - Yeah, I do.
- It's coming from a special place. - I can smell that.
That’s great.
Isn't it getting hot right now? Wow!
It’s nice
- to see you again, Petra.
Is there ever a contestant -
- who has solved so many tasks by getting Mark to take his clothes off?
How was that for you, Mark?
- Was it daring? - I would dare to say so.
But is it as daring as "getting a cheeky tummy ache"?
- Yeah. - What ...?
If you don't know what that is...
That egg came out naughty. It was naughty.
And it ended up where it was supposed to.
So, you were a chicken that laid an egg? That's hot in itself.
We haven’t seen Anders Lund Madsen. I have been promised -
- an ancient Greek heroic poem. The Odyssey.
The Odyssey by Homer has been adapted a boatload of times
But never so compressed and fast-paced...
- as we're about to experience.
Odysseus, who’s the egg, is is engaged in the long Trojan war.
The war is won, and then Odysseus thinks: I have to go home.
He first arrives at the island of the lotus-eaters, a promised island.
It goes on for a few years. Then Odysseus says, "We have to go home."
Exits the island and onto the next island which is the island of the Cyclops.
And the Cyclops catches the egg.
"What is your name?" "My name is Nobody."
Great thinking because at night Odysseus pokes the eye out on the Cyclops.
Ouch! The Cyclops is furious and says: "I am furious!"
Then it turns out that the Cyclops is the son of Poseidon, god of the sea.
Then there's a terrible storm coming, and now it becomes daring.
"We're not going to make it. We're going ashore!"
And they go ashore on Kirke's island. She won't let Odysseus go.
He says: "I'm have to go home to my wife, Penelope."
"Stay!" Kirke says. "Give me three children."
"One, two, three children." "Now go," says Kirke.
Now they pass the island of the sirens. And says ...
And says ... Hold on a second. Then Odysseus says:
"Tie me to the mast so that I do not fall for the sire’s song."
Start the siren.
Stop. Then he says:
"We're almost home. There is one island left. Calypso's island."
Calypso, the most wonderful and irresistible woman of them all.
That's when Odysseus caves in. He lets it all go.
And for seven years Calypso is Odysseus’ woman.
Then he says: "I must go home." She says: "You must stay!"
Then Odysseus says: "No, I want to go home to Penelope!"
And he comes home to Ithaca.
In her embrace in the cup he finds the comfort he has missed.
It was so dangerous. It ended so well.
Fuck, man.
- That was good. - Yeah, but it's missing... Daring.
This is the most daring of all.
It makes James Bond movies look like a cakewalk.
He’s the egg. And then ends up in the embrace of the cup.
I think that's daring, because the egg is there.
If only Homer had described the Odyssey -
- as linguistically convincing as you’ve just done.
Almost like you had forgotten what it was about.
Your re-telling was dramatic, daring, exciting, and educational.
If an ancient history class was like this in high school...
- far more people would be interested.
It was very much a daring placement of the egg in the egg cup.
There are 0 points for broken eggs, Jesper and Hadi.
It's hard to separate the soft pornographic solutions -
- that Petra and Kathrine both went with. So, you get shared second place.
There are 5 points for the re-telling of Odysseus.
After this daring task, I need to calm down a bit.
- What are we going to do next? - This.
- Merry Christmas. - It's a party for the hearts.
Hi, Mark.
But apparently not a Taskmaster-question party -
- because there's nothing here.
Button.
But what the... Oops.
- What a sneaky place. - Yeah.
Is this some kind of height racism?
"We'll make a funny bit with Anders, because he's not tall."
I thought we were past that, Mark.
We still do height racism in Denmark and it’s entertainment for families.
Here...
You didn’t get any footage of me going...
Thank you.
"Find all ten ducks."
What?
- "Do not leave the room..." - "during the task."
"Fastest wins. You have 20 minutes."
"Your time started when you entered the room."
- When I entered the room? - Ducks?
- Ducks.
It's a bit of a treasure hunt.
And as you discovered, time began as you entered the room.
- You look a little befuddled, Kathrine. - That's because of Anders.
Anders has a reputation of taking his time and looking around -
- before opening the envelope. Was it an average of 8 minutes?
Yes, over the prior season Anders spent 4 hours on not opening the tasks.
- Exactly. - That's taken out of context.
- Yeah, but if time has started... - I didn't realize that at the time!
Can't we have just one day a year ...
You need to find 10 ducks. You have 20 minutes.
- Where do we start? - Don't start with me.
Because then it means I did bad and got disqualified. You were looking at me.
"Where do we start?" "With the the bad one." And then you looked at me.
Mark, you have to say it. I'm not saying it.
We'll start with Hadi.
- What does it say? - "Goose."
Why are there flamingos back here?
There's a little stupid duck in here.
Two ducks.
Something the viewers can see it, but I can't.
Is it one of those?
No, nothing. A duck!
Duck.
Have you got a duck up your ass? There’s a duck.
Fuck you, Mark.
There are more ducks on you.
Don't fuck with me. Come on, Mark.
- Duck, damn it! - Oh, over there.
Nine.
Time’s up. You found 9.
Mark, you know I love you. It's just pure banter.
Sometimes a little too hard but it's friendly.
I felt like I needed to say that before the audience got scared.
And those who think: That elf is not nice.
Hadi, we’re going to rank you based on -
- how many ducks you find and how fast.
- And you found 9 out of 10 ducks. - That's great!
Was it really necessary to smash that little box to pieces?
- It's pretty easy to open. - Was it possible to open it?
I am both Arab and from Jutland. It happens from time to time.
- I need to go to therapy. - Who are we going to see next?
Anders Lund Madsen, you've had a habit of...
- of taking a long time before opening the tasks.
But it's a disease. Fine, roll the tape.
Well...
You have a little person which were used to be call midgets back in the day.
"Just grow taller.” That’s what you effectively said.
The whole foundation of that task is based on hate.
That’s why I understand where you’re coming from, because there’s extreme amount of hate in this task.
One day a year.
I have noticed 3 flamingos.
That's correct. It's been 8 minutes so far.
Last time you pulled that out of your pants, I shouldn’t have opened the package.
That's not the case here.
It's been 8 minutes and Marks not lying.
"Find all 10 ducks. Your time started when you entered the room."
You weren't lying. How could I think you were lying?
- Half the time has almost passed. - No, it hasn’t.
Damn it, it's a goose. It says goose.
That was a just a trick. Oops, that was a mistake.
I have found a duck call.
I've missed this little light. How do you turn off the lights in here?
Now we’re laughing at the little fat midget again. Ha-ha!
There's a duck. What do we have here?
Aha!
Time’s up.
You know what I found difficult? Being judged by my height.
- Who did that? - You did. Lasse did.
Everyone can see them if they’re 3 meters tall. "There are ducks everywhere."
Yes of course, you get everything on a silver platter because you're tall enough to participate on this show.
Then you would be able to see everything on that bar.
- Thanks for shit, Mark. - You're welcome.
You make it sound like -
- you're in between Victor Lander and Tobias Rahim.
10 minutes has passed before you open the task.
And in just 10 minutes you found... How many ducks?
- 7 ducks. - That's not enough.
I'm curious to see if anyone found all of them. Who do we see next?
Lets watch all 3 go on a nice duck hunt.
But also a little detour about consent.
"Your time started, when you walked into the room."
Ducks?
- Are they in this area? - Yes, they’re in the room.
That’s not ducks. That’s flamingos.
It's a duck call.
It would be great if 5 ducks suddenly appeared.
"Goose." That's funny, because it's not a duck.
Duck!
Can I smash it?
1.
Not violent.
Uh-huh.
- Yes! - Mark, come over here.
Lift up your hat.
Mark!
- Can I touch? - Yes.
That's how you do it.
Do you need to take your pants off?
- Take them off. - Take off all your clothes. Sorry.
Okay.
Wow, Mark!
My god.
Thor in the flesh.
Thor, the god of thunder. Quark next to him.
Try shaking like this.
Yes, like that.
Turn around.
Do you have something in your butt?
- Mark? - Yes?
Can we just...?
No ducks. Sorry. Seriously I’m really sorry.
- Tell me where they are. - I'm stalling a bit.
- Duck! - Ah! Another one down here.
The last duck...
- Do I have anything on me? - Do I have anything on me?
If I go like this then I'm a duck.
Duck.
- Your time’s up. - The word’s was all around the room.
Did you have something up there? That would be crazy.
Jesper and Kathrine -
- welcome to the Let's Get Mark to Take Off His Clothes-party.
The host is Petra who's been there all along.
No one inspects the room more thoroughly than Quark does Thor.
Still, no one managed to to find them all. Which one are they missing?
They are all missing one but different ones. Kathrine is missing the duck call.
Jesper Ole does not find the word on the bar at the celling.
And Petra doesn’t find the one in the leg of the table.
So, no one found all 10. Then we have to rank them by time.
How do we distribute the points?
Anders, you get a single point. You found 7 ducks but on half the time.
The others found 9 ducks, so we need to look at the time.
From slowest, and fewest points:
2 points for Jesper Ole, 3 for Hadi and 4 for Kathrine.
But Petra was the fastest to to find her 9 ducks.
You had found them, before Anders had even...
We're missing a single Christmas task from my Christmas house. What is that?
It’s about the exciting device: The photocopier.
- Merry Christmas, Mark. - The old printer.
- Wow! Is it like an office Christmas party? - What do you mean? [Julefrokoster is translated to Christmas lunches and not Christmas parties. A Scandinavian tradition where people get together to eat, drink a lot (Christmas beer, schnapps) and play games with friends and family. Sometimes you delegate the food and make it into a buffet. Food often eaten: ryebread with pickled herring, liver paté or salmon. Meatballs, pork roast, pork sausage, tartlets and risalamande as a dessert. Risalamande is rice pudding with whipped cream and almonds. In this context it’s more an office Christmas party they’re referring to.]
What often happens at office Christmas parties? [Julefrokoster is translated to Christmas lunches and not Christmas parties. A Scandinavian tradition where people get together to eat, drink a lot (Christmas beer, schnapps) and play games with friends and family. Sometimes you delegate the food and make it into a buffet. Food often eaten: ryebread with pickled herring, liver paté or salmon. Meatballs, pork roast, pork sausage, tartlets and risalamande as a dessert. Risalamande is rice pudding with whipped cream and almonds. In this context it’s more an office Christmas party they’re referring to.]
What...? [Julefrokoster is translated to Christmas lunches and not Christmas parties. A Scandinavian tradition where people get together to eat, drink a lot (Christmas beer, schnapps) and play games with friends and family. Sometimes you delegate the food and make it into a buffet. Food often eaten: ryebread with pickled herring, liver paté or salmon. Meatballs, pork roast, pork sausage, tartlets and risalamande as a dessert. Risalamande is rice pudding with whipped cream and almonds. In this context it’s more an office Christmas party they’re referring to.]
We copy each other's butts of course.
I'll sit on it.
- "Make a Santa..." - "With this photocopier."
"You can’t leave the room."
- For the rest of my life? - Just for the duration of the task.
"Best Santa wins."
"You have 20 minutes. Your time starts now."
Santa?
- Photocopier. - I see.
We've put you on a remedial restrictive diet here.
Because you’re not allowed to leave the room and pick up other things.
You have what you see. There’s a photocopier and a bulletin board.
Still, there are a lot of creative ways to solve this task.
Who do we start with?
This is a very open to interpretation task.
There are a couple of different possible interpretations.
I didn't expect that I would once again...
... had to undress.
But you have to keep in mind that Petra is still on the show.
Again?
"Make a Santa with this photocopier."
Can you just hang things?
Uh, no. Oh, there are buttons.
You could also turn this into a Santa.
- Beard. - Does this look like a Santa beard?
I don't know if this is a bad idea. Can your head even come through here?
Did someone come dressing up as Santa in your family?
We started doing that the last couple of years. I need to find a picture.
First, it's Santa's wife.
Take off your clothes.
Hey!
There she is. But now I have to make Santa.
Admit it, Mark. It looks like Santa Claus.
There you go. I’ll just remove this.
- See ya. - Bye.
I'm a bag full of presents.
Are we done?
Just tonight it’s the third time you've gotten Mark to take his clothes off.
It's gone from being a quirky little thing –
- to be... Can I call it an addiction?
- Yes, you can. - You shouldn't really get any reward for that.
But we're unconventional so we've done it anyways.
Merry Christmas, Petra.
Mark? Is that a Tobias Rahim picture but with you instead?
If we're going to talk about Rahim references...
- It is, Petra... - A calendar!
A calendar.
Because...
This is so great.
It going next to the calendar my kids made.
Those pictures should hang right next to you on your nightstand.
Above my boyfriend's head.
Thank you so much.
That was a small gift. And Jesper...
What do I get?
What I want as my Christmas gift is an explanation from you. What are you doing in this task?
It's a continuation of the career as the new Jørgen Clevin -
- which is in the gutter.
Those were the first two solutions. What else do you have in store?
We’re going to the two people who revealed that they have...
... sat on top of a photocopier before.
- Anders and Kathrine. - You and me.
It would be cool to make a body with my body. Almost full-size.
Ho-ho-ho.
- Fuck, that’s Sant. - Can you press it?
Merry Christmas.
She's been bitten by a mad Santa.
It's going to be the little fat Santa. But that’s why you guys like.
There you go.
- It's starting to take shape. - Definitely.
A new kind of yoga. Brother yoga.
I don't have pretty toes.
Thank you. Now we just have to...
It's running.
Yes! It doesn't look like a dead leg or anything from a corpse.
Well, well. What are we missing?
Press the button, Mark.
Press start. Go to the other side.
Right? Can you just...
Here we fucking go. My body is so wide there.
- Well... - Press start.
- Can I have a look? Well, there it is. - He’s a little rascal, isn't he?
There we go.
- That wasn't worth it at all. - It’s a good ass.
What does it actually look like? Holy shit, man.
I think that’s it.
I think that's pretty good. With what I got to work with.
Merry Christmas, Mark.
Ho-ho.
You’re both making, individually and collectively, -
- the scariest Santas I've ever seen.
There's something quite devilish about a Santa who has a butt in front.
Sort of. It's a gift no child has ever wanted for Christmas.
It's for those who are naughty not nice.
Are you happy with the results?
Mine is a bit short. It's missing a little extra arm, leg and body length.
There's nothing wrong with not being tall.
- I was thinking about you. - I like that.
But it’s two interesting Santas. We're still missing Hadi.
We're missing Hadi...
I feel like I know why you're picking me last.
There's been a pattern with you, Hadi.
A little feisty elf.
It’s going to be fun to see you handle old electronics.
Is there any cheating in this?
"Setup guide".
- I'm not sure what you want to do. - I want to print a picture of Santa.
- How's that going? - Uh, not so good.
Come on, Brother.
Is there a printer somewhere?
"Printing for Brother."
I'll probably end up spending all my time on this.
Come on, Brother.
Uh!
How much time do I have left?
- A minute and a half. - God damn it! Come on, Brother.
Come on, Brother.
We are approaching the last minute.
- Is it there? - Bitches.
The whitest Santa Claus I could find.
See you.
Brother.
What? Nothing.
I hope you're talking to the printer. I am.
I have to say this to you with love.
It’s the most personality-less Santa Claus I've ever seen.
And I've just seen a Santa made from a printer and two sheets of A4 paper.
It doesn't say you have to make a Santa with personality.
It says that the Santa has to be made using the photocopier.
The key word is “made”.
I feel a little like a freshman...
- who has handed in an essay -
- but doesn’t tell the teacher that it was written with ChatGPT.
That's how I feel.
Can't we just have one day a year...
...just enjoying ourselves?
I'm ready to distribute the points. I'd like to see all 5 Santas.
- I like the bag of presents. - The bag! The bag!
- 1 point for Jesper Ole. - Yeah! What a shame.
2 points for Hadi. But not one.
Thank you, Lasse.
So Petra gets more points than me?
It's a close race between the next two. It's the bag that makes the difference.
3 points for Kathrine, 4 for Petra. And I love the reverse butt.
- 5 points for that. - Thanks, Lasse.
Thank you, Lasse. It's so exciting.
The final task will be crucial. It's happening on this stage right now.
Mark, who’s going to read the final task out loud?
I think Hadi should.
Frisky.
- Here you go. - Why did you choose Hadi?
Let's just...
"Predict whether an object will make a louder or quieter sound
- than the last object. Most correct guesses wins."
We start with a sound, that establishes a base level.
- Then you can guess higher or lower from that. - It's the bell.
- Are you ready. - Yes, I'm ready.
60 dB.
98.8 dB.
Holy shit, that's high.
Now the final task begins.
I’m now going to stir this bowl of Christmas ornaments with this ladle.
And for those with a culinary interest, especially Jesper:
Yes, it’s figure-eight stirring. And I’ll do it with great enthusiasm.
Do you think the sound it makes is louder or quieter?
- Quieter? - Yes.
- And you think...? - I'm actually on quieter, too.
- It's going to be exciting. - Are you ready?
105.7 dB.
So that was higher than the first number.
The next sound you need to decide on...
I’ve chosen this walnut which I want to crack with this nutcracker.
Will the sound be louder or quieter -
- than the sound I made with the Christmas ornaments?
- Only one walnut? - We have three that say quieter. Four.
- Everyone has decided on quieter. - What if it screams in pain.
Full house on quieter. Mark I’m cracking.
Frisky. 103.6 dB.
It's loud but still quieter. All 5 get points.
Our furry, mechanical Christmas friend here will start in a moment.
I'm going to treat it violently.
Some would say too violently, in the hopes of starting mechanical protests.
- Are you going to smash the monkey? - You don't ask a man that.
Can't Mark take off his clothes? Then he can smash the monkey.
What are you guessing? Louder.
There’s full house on louder.
Mark, are we ready? Play, monkey.
- Oh no! - But now it's going to being wrecked.
It doesn't like to be beaten.
101, 6 dB.
- It was quieter. - It was quieter.
I'm going to unwrap this gift from Mark le Fêvre -
- with the enthusiasm that only a spoiled only child would show.
- That was 101, right? - 101,6.
My goodness.
You think quieter? What’s inside that thing?
I love that you’re coordinating your answers. You're playing against each other.
- I'd definitely go quieter. - It's cheeky.
Three says louder. What about you two?
- Should we do it? - Lets do it. Thelma and Louise.
Then I'll go quieter.
Great. Your answers are locked. Mark, are you ready to measure?
I can't open it.
- 103,3. - Louder.
Last chance for points. I’m going to cut the string.
And this portion of rice pudding will hit the table -
- as we have all experienced with our families at Christmas time.
I hope it's a really loud sound.
It's also a tradition to do that in many homes.
Will it be a louder or quieter sound?
It's going to be a bang. It's got splat sound to it.
Quieter, quieter. I’ll bet on louder.
4 are going quieter and Jesper Ole says louder.
- Are you ready to measure? - Yes.
No!
That looks so wrong.
92.4 dB. Quieter.
Five rounds.
How are the points distributed between our 5 contestants?
We have a winner for this task and that’s Hadi.
- It doesn't matter. - And...
We have a winner of the Christmas episode, and that winner is...
Anders Lund Madsen!
What did I say?
Did you say that?
He can take home my slightly concave face made by pure gingerbread.
Anders Lund Madsen is this year's Christmas Taskmaster winner.
If you've just tuned in, you've missed it all. But Merry Christmas anyways.
Translation for r/panelshow December 2023